Incredibles 2 (2018!?!)

  • Gist: Pixar animated movie about a family of powered superheroes in an alt-history USA in which superheroes have been made illegal. Immediate Sequel to the 2004 Incredibles. That’s right: FOURTEEN years ago! WHY did it take so long?! I bet…[flashback…flashback…flashback…]
  •  2004: That was Incredible! (chuckles.) We made a great movie and barrels of money! Let’s announce a sequel while the run’s still going! Oh, that’s not a thing yet? Ok, we’ll make it next year. It would be dumb not to!
  • 2005: Let’s just make the exact same movie all over again. That’s what sequels do!
  • 2006: Ok, try this: the Incredibles lead an army of bitter superheroes in a global revolt against Orwellian authority! What? Why not?
  • 2007: How about a prequel showing how Mr and Mrs met? Yeah, so what if the children don’t exist yet? We could imply Violet’s conception!
  • 2008: All right, say it’s 15 years later, Mr and Mrs are aging empty-nesters, Violet and Dash have their own super-powered kids, but…wait for it…Jack-Jack is the supervillain! What? Why are you crying?
  • 2009: I’ve got it! Mr and Mrs divide in their view of whether supers should work within or against the system, Violet takes Dad’s side and Dash takes Mom’s, they have a series of dramatic clashes in which their love and loyalties are…WHY are you interrupting me??
  • 2010: Can we please just make the exact same movie all over again?
  • 2011: Is Craig T Nelson even still alive?
  • 2012: Everybody likes a Dad-over-his-head parenting story, but it’s important we not have a cliche villain. Any ideas?
  • 2013: Ok, we got parenting, gender role reversal, surveillance state paranoia, ethical dilemma…got a villain yet? And how do we wedge Edna into this??
  • 2014: Do you have any idea how hard it is to animate dextrous hands and feet?!
  • 2015: Someone please make SURE Craig T Nelson is still alive.
  • 2016: Do you realize Violet’s voice actor is now a famous cultural historian on the high side of 50?
  • 2017: Get ’em recording fast! Fast!! Release the teasers! Get Craig some vitamins!
  • 2018: What year is it? WHO is President?? Anyway, let’s hope the kids at least will like it as much as the first one. Oh, right; those kids have their own babies now. Well, draw in a baby poop joke. That’s really all we need.

Conclusion: Like the first one, it’s Incredible. Don’t miss it!

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